Mindset Collapse#
I haven't spoken or updated my status on Twitter for a long time recently, and many people might guess the reason. Since the TST incident, which resulted in a loss of $300,000, I was left with only $50,000. After a series of PVP operations, I managed to recover to about $140,000, but then I lost another $100,000 on the alpaca project, returning to square one. Two consecutive years of losses (with a $600,000 loss in 2024) have trapped me in a vicious cycle in the crypto world. Investment losses have led to a collapse in my mindset, low spirits, and subsequent anxiety-driven poor decisions, exacerbating the losses. This post is not a complaint but a serious reflection to identify the root causes and force myself out of this predicament.
Review of Operations#
Looking back at the recent losses, on the surface, they seem to be due to market fluctuations and bad luck, but upon deeper analysis, I must admit that personal issues are predominant. My operations lack planning, often relying on intuition to place orders without setting stop-loss points, like a headless fly. I stop-loss at the slightest market fluctuation, then chase after rising prices and sell at falling prices, leading to unclear losses. After incurring losses, emotional trading intensifies, and in a rush to recover, I blindly chase various opportunities, such as following wallets, popular projects, and heavily investing in "insider" information, resulting in a chaotic and worsening situation where emotions completely dominate decision-making.
The most painful part during this time has been the self-doubt triggered by repeated losses. From initially bouncing back quickly to later becoming numb, I began to question whether I was being eliminated by the market and whether I was unsuited for investing. In endless self-blame, I fell into a state of giving up, spending my days watching videos, playing games, and going out, using dopamine to temporarily numb myself, refusing to review my losses, thinking "if I lose, I lose," resulting in continued worsening of losses.
Always wrong, always losing, one mistake leads to another.
In fact, to this day, I still cannot let go; whenever the night is quiet, I recall those missed big opportunities.
After years of aimlessly wandering in the crypto world, I have not achieved significant results.
What should I do now? To be honest, I once gave up completely, letting everything go.
As I write this, I realize I cannot continue like this. Short-term losses are not the scariest; the scariest thing is being stuck in this state for a long time. I must pull myself together, redefine myself, and start anew!
This post is my new starting point and a commitment to myself. I no longer want to be bound by losses and giving up; I must take responsibility. Investing is a long-distance race, and emotions and mindset are the equipment; I must repair the equipment before I can run far.
If you are also in a similar low point, I hope we can work together to get out of this predicament. If you have successfully made it, please share your experiences and advice; thank you very much!
Possible Issues#
- The position may be too heavy; the market has plenty of opportunities, and there is no need to heavily invest in a single position. High leverage reduces margin for error.
- For operations with alpaca and TST, consider shifting to less crowded areas to seek opportunities.
Lessons Learned#
- Reduce leverage and trading frequency; take profits and stop. Initially, I would limit the number of trades, but I have now given that up; placing orders feels like an opportunity that comes once a year. Full positions and not setting stop-losses have become habits, but the pain of holding onto losing positions feels like experiencing death.
- Continuously study alpha and look for suitable fields.
- Position management is crucial; gradually accumulating by taking profits is better.
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